Want to know my secret? It’s my iPhone off button.
Permission to be intentional.
“You don’t owe anyone a phoenix-rising-from-the-ashes moment.” - Grace
If Instagram is the truth, then it seems that everyone is hydrated, extremely profitable, and making millions of dollars after gracefully pivoting their businesses just a short time ago. They’re taking tumeric supplements, landing keynote speeches, and creating empires all while enjoying a plant-based lifestyle and raising four toddlers. They figured it out fast, focused on exactly what they wanted and needed to do, and then whaddy’a know, they’re making 7-figures, working 4-days a week from a remote village in Bali, and they’re in the best shape of their lives.
Best part, is they did it in less than a year. That’s the social media dream of entrepreneurship.
Here’s the thing. The glory stories of figuring it all out fast, making tons of money, and working by the pool of an exotic resort are exactly that…they’re stories. And they make us feel like somehow we’re missing something, we’re inadequate, and we’re treading water.
Just like we tell kids to be mindful of comparison, aka “It’s not real!”...we need the same reminders.
Throughout my business, I’ve learned that the best way to get myself out of an insecure funk was to turn off my phone. I learned the hard way that social media wasn’t lifting me up and making me into the business leader I wanted to be. The only person who could really do that was me. With the help of people I trusted (aka not Instagram).
The real truth is that we are evolving. We are reemerging from who we were before to who we are today. And, we’ve learned a lot along the way. Wisdom is earned and we’ve earned it.
We’ve learned that hustling and over-working doesn’t really work. We’ve learned that burnout without some sort of break can lead to a maelstrom of other problems. We’ve learned that creating something that is truly worthwhile is like an art; it takes time. And typically, more time than you think.
I learned this lesson again and again as I closed the doors to The Hivery’s coworking spaces. And yet, I still found myself tempted with pressure I put on myself to pivot fast, figure it out, and presto-chango create something magical in my next breath.
I even felt pressure sometimes when encouraging people would say, “I can’t wait to see what you create next.” because I truly didn’t know what that next rendition was going to look like.
Can you relate?
There were tears and sleepless nights. There were doubts about where to go next. There were questions about how to transition the Hivery from an in-person inspiration lab to an equally empowering online community with IRL retreats and events woven in.
But there was also a sense of curiosity. A quiet wondering about what could take shape... A sort of chrysalis for me and the community. This was our chance to do something different during what are clearly very different times. Times that we need community more than ever.
As things became more unsettled, I had my moments of wanting to curl up and cry, but surprisingly, I also found my resolve getting stronger. Amidst all the noise, I’m even more committed to helping creative, womxn entrepreneurs build meaningful businesses and work on their terms. With the bank balances and flexible schedules to prove it.
That evolution couldn’t be forced or rushed; I needed time to figure it out.
Because, the reality is, that no matter how much social media tells you that everyone else has it all figured out — change is a process. Change is life. And no matter how many epic transformation stories you read, true transformation doesn’t happen in an instant. It’s an unfolding, a peeling back of layers, shedding old ideas and even identities.
Which leads me to you: you don’t owe anyone a phoenix-rising-from-the-ashes moment. You don't have to work at breakneck speed to make a difference. You don’t have to be like Beyonce rising from the trap door under the stage (although that would be cool). You can evolve. At your pace. It doesn’t have to happen all at once.
So, if you’re starting or rebuilding your business or your straight-up life, it’s perfectly okay to thoughtfully feel your way through your next chapter. To follow your intuition, versus the crowds. To take those initial steps slowly and consciously. To NOT announce every step of the way on social media. To focus on wisdom and maturity rather than noise and drama. To appreciate the sense of cautious excitement. To humor the sympathetic head tilts about what you’re working on without taking them to heart.
That’s certainly what we’re doing.
Of course, when we moved the Hivery online, we could have gone big, moved fast, and broken things like the bros we overhear in Silicon Valley coffee shops. We could have taken out a bunch of Facebook ads, rounded up celebrity members, and shouted all over the internet, “Look at how perfectly we pivoted!”
But that’s not really how we do things here. We like to keep it real, keep it vulnerable, and really know each other. It’s probably not how you do things either.
You don’t have to be Instagram-loud to make an impact.
You know that kindness is more powerful than the hustle. You know that whatever change looks like for you right now, when you have the right support you can move towards it courageously, mindfully — and unapologetically.
And, you know that you’d love a circle of trusted advisors and friends to cheer you on along the path. A community that you can ask questions of (without wondering if you should know the answer already), that you can be honest with what’s discouraging you, and that you can share the victories with as they come in (without the megaphone of having to post it on Instagram).
If you’re ready to build or grow your biz, write a book, or take your creative work to the next level — and without apology for keeping it real — we’d love to invite you to join our next cohort of Hivery Members.
No matter whether you’re just starting out, or whether you’ve been running your own thing for a long time and are waiting for that breakthrough, we would LOVE to help you take your creative entrepreneurship to the next level. Together.
In community,
Grace
